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DIARY NOTES

The Book

 

 

I started on the “Diary Notes” in 2014. My idea was to paint a series of small self-portraits in the A4-format. My gaze was soon turned around, and what was intended as self-portraits turned into something else. The paintings became expressive experiments as part of a process to find my own, artistic expression.

 

I still paint my “Diary Notes”. During the years I have painted more than 150 portraits. They are not portraying me as I look. They are more like pictures of different moods and fantasies that appears and reappears. To bring all this onto the canvas, I use oil paint as my medium. I twist and knead it in thick layers. I process it until the shapes are dissolved and the images meet my intentions and requirements. I am a colorist, working intuitively. Almost everything is allowed. The layers of paint can be repainted many times before I am fully content.

 

Portraits from everyday life are those that interest me the most. They have developed into fantasies of how we feel behind our facade. I want to express those feelings and they must be genuine. When I have bad days, I know that most people also have them. Those days, hours or minutes are part of our life. We keep smiling happily and seem untouched to those around us. In the end we only fool ourselves. The difficulty of showing those tough sides of life makes me curious. This gives me a desire to continue my project.

 

Oscar Wilde’s 1890’s novel “The Picture of Dorian Gray” has caught my interest. The story lurks in my mind when I work with the “Diary Notes”. The novel is about Dorian Gray who sells his soul in order to remain young and beautiful. His age and all his sins does not mark his appearance. Instead his painted portrait gradually gets older and uglier. His life is more and more becoming a double life. With today's consumer community and popular culture, this novel is equally relevant as when it first was published.